Explain a Bond Film Plot Badly

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  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    Diamonds Are Forever Bond impersonates Peter Franks, Bond impersonates klaus Hergesheimer, Bond impersonates Bert Saxby, Bond impersonates an astronaut, Blofeld Impersonates Willard White, a Blofeld Clone impersonates Blofeld, another Blofeld Clone impersonates Blofeld, a Blofeld wannabe Clone dies attempting to impersonate Blofeld, Blofeld impersonates a woman, Plenty dies because the goons think she's Tiffany, Tiffany impersonates a brunette, Tiffany impersonates a blonde, tiddles is impersonated by a wrong pussy. Impersonation's are Forever

    A cassette tape impersonates butt cheeks.
    ...Blofeld thinks about turning them into brains.
  • Tiffany cassette Case... I'll get my coat
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 34,609
    FRWL: A man gives wine pairing tips to one of his rivals.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    GF: Listening to The Beatles is a bad thing.
  • On Her Majesty's Secret Service Bond discovers Curling is a great way to pickup up women.
  • RichardTheBruceRichardTheBruce I'm motivated by my Duty.
    edited October 2017 Posts: 8,951
    Diamonds Are Forever Bond impersonates Peter Franks, Bond impersonates klaus Hergesheimer, Bond impersonates Bert Saxby, Bond impersonates an astronaut, Blofeld Impersonates Willard White, a Blofeld Clone impersonates Blofeld, another Blofeld Clone impersonates Blofeld, a Blofeld wannabe Clone dies attempting to impersonate Blofeld, Blofeld impersonates a woman, Plenty dies because the goons think she's Tiffany, Tiffany impersonates a brunette, Tiffany impersonates a blonde, tiddles is impersonated by a wrong pussy. Impersonation's are Forever
    Peter Franks (posthumously) impersonates James Bond.
    Good-Worth-x-Playboy-Club-Blank-Key-_259386.jpg
  • MurdockMurdock Mr. 2000
    Posts: 16,036
    FRWL: World powers fight over a typewriter.
  • For your Eyes Only The Saint and Doctor Hans Zarkov team up to thwart Walter Donovan from selling the Holy Grail to the Russians.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Eve Stavro Blofeld
    Posts: 4,314
    Murdock wrote: »
    FRWL: World powers fight over a typewriter.

    FYEO: World powers fight over an Atari.
  • Posts: 684
    FYEO: A skater's olympic hopes are put on ice when her sponsor threatens to pull support amid an opium-related scandal.
    pachazo wrote: »
    LALD : A Louisiana sheriff stumbles upon a swamp full of black Russians.
    Very good.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Kingdumb of Norway
    Posts: 41,309
    SP Blofeld tries to take over the Americans job.
  • Tomorrow Never Dies Pain face takes on a media mogul who's wife shares a mysterious past with Bond, the chemistry between Bond and Paris Carver is electric, they almost convince the audience they had previously met such is the Stella quality of the acting.
  • Posts: 12,231
    OHMSS.

    A love story where a marriage eventually takes place, but she dies in the end anyway!!!
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    LALD: The British Intelligence is unusually concerned with a criminal case that's for NYPD and DEA to handle rather than a counter-espionage operative.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Eve Stavro Blofeld
    Posts: 4,314
    DAD: Madonna closes her body now.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 2,989
    mattjoes wrote: »
    DAD: Madonna closes her body now.

    If only she'd close her mouth.
  • Agent_99Agent_99 enjoys a spirited ride as much as the next girl
    Posts: 2,570
    Oh is it 'now'? I'd always heard it as 'down'.

    Not that 'now' makes any more sense.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 2,989
    Agent_99 wrote: »
    Oh is it 'now'? I'd always heard it as 'down'.

    Not that 'now' makes any more sense.

    Perhaps Sigmund Freud could analyze it for us.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Eve Stavro Blofeld
    Posts: 4,314
    Agent_99 wrote: »
    Oh is it 'now'? I'd always heard it as 'down'.

    Not that 'now' makes any more sense.

    Perhaps Sigmund Freud could analyze it for us.

    If only he'd avoid the cliche.


    @Agent_99 I always heard it as now. But yeah, it makes little difference.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic70BradyM0Bondfanatic7 It was this or the priesthood.
    Posts: 28,231
    Agent_99 wrote: »
    Oh is it 'now'? I'd always heard it as 'down'.

    Not that 'now' makes any more sense.

    Perhaps Sigmund Freud could analyze it for us.

    It would have something to do with Madonna wanting to sleep with her father and kill her mother in competition for his love. Or something approximating it.
  • Goldeneye: A nymphomaniac with a wrestling fetish plans a heist with a British ex-pat.
  • pachazopachazo Make Your Choice
    edited October 2017 Posts: 7,186
    TSWLM : JAWS - Don't Go In The Water.
    MR : JAWS 2 - The Search For Love.

    AVTAK : After discovering Viagra, a 57 year old man sets out to bed as many women as possible, but may have gotten more than he bargained for when he meets a woman with a large black sex toy.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    QoS: A British agent is concerned about the environment of a third world country hardly anybody has heard of, out of love for humanity and world peace. He also is looking for the people who did his woman wrong.
  • M_BaljeM_Balje Amsterdam, Netherlands
    edited November 2017 Posts: 3,747
    DR NO: Eliot carver created his own news. This doctor need patience and this is why he created Nessy for his patience who think there have seen nessy. Krabb story.

    TLD: Do you know you can be cool with cow milk if you don't like to drink it. This movie is sponserd by Campina. Krabbe story suported by prinses of wales (and Charles).

    Goldeneye: A Ferrari, Astin Martin and screaming old lady... this is not a joke.
  • ThunderfingerThunderfinger Kingdumb of Norway
    Posts: 41,309
    I was going to post exactly the same thing.
  • JamesBondKenyaJamesBondKenya Danny Boyle laughs to himself
    Posts: 2,700
    Qos: someone steals some water
  • TLD: A cello player misses the most important shot of her life.
  • Posts: 19,339
    AVTAK : James Bond was 5 days from Alaska.
  • ClarkDevlinClarkDevlin Martinis, Girls and Guns
    Posts: 15,423
    @barryt007 do a TLD! do a TLD!
  • edited November 2017 Posts: 19,339
    @barryt007 do a TLD! do a TLD!

    If you insist ;) :

    TLD: Bond meets a stick insect with an adams apple and a dodgy haircut,and cant shake her off for 2hours of my bloody time !!
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