mattjoes

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Username
mattjoes
Location
couldn't think of a witty thing to write here so decided to leave it blank.
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1,185
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Member
Posts
1,611
Favourite Fleming Novel
-Classified-
Favourite Bond Film
-Classified-
Favourite Bond Actor
-Classified-

Activity

  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    April 13
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    April 4
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    April 4
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    March 20
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    March 17
    • Dragonpol
      Dragonpol
      Now that's a good one!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Thank you, Dragonpol!
    • Dragonpol
      Dragonpol
      My pleasure. I'm from NI.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Beg your pardon?
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Nigeria.
    • Dragonpol
      Dragonpol
      Northern Ireland.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Awesome! I'd love to visit it. Beautiful country. I'm from Chile.
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      I would really love to go to South America some day.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    March 10
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    February 18
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      The original. The only.

      The best.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      You know the name. You know the number. No limits. No fears. No substitutes.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      'Where The Brosnan Does Shine'
      by Matthew Joes
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      It is the word of Joes.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Eat at Joe's.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Have some of my conch chowder.
  • 0BradyM0Bondfanatic7
    Loving that avatar, mate. Pun very much intended.
    February 15
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Thank you, Brady!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      And glad to see you back, by the way!
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    February 14
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Brosnan is back! Visit your neighbors and spread the love!

      But don't forget to knock.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9NzhjcPsQQ
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      The Brosnosaurus is a sexist, mysoginist Dinosaur. It is mostly home in areas like the french Riviera or cuban beaches.
      It feeds mostly on vodka martinis and delectado cigars. The male Brosnosaurus can have an almost unlimited number of females to mate throughout the year.
    • DikkoHenderson
      DikkoHenderson
      and when it comes to the Brosnosaurus' eating habits- they feast... like there's no tomorrow.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      They enjoy it while it lasts, you could say it's their Motto.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Once in a while, the Brosnosaurus likes to study a new tongue.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      The Brosnosaurus is feared as a deadly Predator specialized in hostile takeovers as he's constantly expanding his territory
    • DikkoHenderson
      DikkoHenderson
      "It seems a small crisis is brewing in the prehistoric era.."
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    January 30
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      "Did he take the piano with him??? Ha ha ha ha ha!"
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      "Only you would think about sex at a time like this."
    • Dragonpol
      Dragonpol
      Looks like Billy Connolly!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Indeed.
  • BMW_with_missiles
    The Brosnana wishes you well.
    [img][/img]6IzbsLnl.jpg
    January 27
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Pretty cool. Pre-tteh cool-ah.

      Can it be used to finance revolutions?
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      Not only can it be used to finance revolutions, it can fight victoriously in them.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      A revolution-fighting Brosnana. What will they think of next?
    • BondJasonBond006
      BondJasonBond006
      Brosnan works on anything! And hey...a Brosnana a day keeps the doctor away!
      #brosnanforever
      #nothingcompares
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      #VivaLaBrosnus
    • DikkoHenderson
      DikkoHenderson
      Nothing like a breakfast Brosnana and then follow it up with a nice, slow-burning Delectado. They never go out...
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      - And it's got as much mojo as me!
      - If you shay sho Mr. Brosnan!
      - Yeah.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Let this be a place of worship and admiration my Brosners and Sisters
    • BondJasonBond006
      BondJasonBond006
      Brosmance in the air!
    • DikkoHenderson
      DikkoHenderson
      "Keep up the charade of being lovers."
  • ClarkDevlin
    You know? I do miss this fellow. He should be put into a place where he could shine.

    pierce+brosnan+james+bond.jpg
    January 26
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      He's been taking a well-earned vacation. But don't worry, he will. He will.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      He's just having an overdue holiday, then.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Legends says he is living on an Island with Halle Berry, and he's super rich now.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Oh, so they went down together.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    January 22
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Exceptionally fine shot.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      ...of Plenty's ass.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Magnificent, isn't she?
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      How... fast, does she fall?
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Zero to 60 in 3.2 seconds.
      And a few little tricks up her um... panties.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Do they do anything?
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      All the usual refinements: ejector seat, torpedoes, target-seeking shotguns to shoot down mobile objects. Titanium armor. A multi-tasking heads up display. And six beverage cup holders. All in all, rather stocked.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      With all those gadgets I wonder how much space they have left for Tchaikovskies.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      there should be enough room for at least one Tchaikovsky, unfortunately there isn't enough room for me and your ego
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Then I shall take it out of the equation.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    January 16
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      One minute and counting.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Forty seconds and counting.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Remain on standby.
      Approximately forty seconds to go.
      Synchronize radio beam for toppling.
      Run to full power. Fuel elements 21.
  • ClarkDevlin
    Does this trigger your inner NFS fan? :D

    January 9
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Yes, it does! Rom Di Prisco is part of what makes those early games great, along with Saki Kaskas. A very elegant sound.

      Looking at the photo of the car I'm reminded of an album I put together about ten years ago, with drawings I made of sports cars from NFS and other sources.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Too right, mattjoes! Too right! The pre-Underground NFS games had very elegant sounds to name whether they were progressive rock or electronic techno as well as others like two of the aforementioned composers have contributed onto. Rom Di Prisco is an unsurpassed king at what he does. If I'm honest, he's the reason '007 Racing' is playable for me to begin with. Alistair Hirst also provided some great tracks, and so did Jeff Dyck. One of my all time favourite tracks from the entirety of the NFS games is "Showcase" by Hirst from the first game, and my all time favourite is "Dr. Know" (you think that was a play on 'Dr. No' or something?) by Rom Di Prisco. Christ! I miss the old days...

      I've always loved the photograph above as it definitely contains classic NFS humour... A sportscar competing with a jet. Where are those kinds of greatness when you require them? :D
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      I haven't played 007 Racing. Didn't even know Rom Di Prisco did the music!

      Some of my favorite themes from the games are Halling It (Robert Ridihalgh, NFS2), Main Menu (Rom Di Prisco, NFS2), Romulus 3 (Rom Di Prisco, NFS3), Triton (Rom Di Prisco, NFS3), Callista (Saki Kaskas, NFS4).

      That Showcase theme is damn cool.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      And Cygnus Rift by Di Prisco from NFS4. Mustn't forget that.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      All of those are absolutely great! Can't argue with that list!

      Here's a sample from '007 Racing' by Rom Di Prisco:
      https://youtu.be/i0rn_vd64PI
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Cool! Combine great things (Di Prisco's talent and James Bond music) and great things will happen. Went ahead and listened to a few others. Love the horns in Track 3.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Menu is pretty great too.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      I tell you, '007 Racing' is only worth a shot if you love the Bond cars and NFS type music. It's a crying shame though that an inferior team of developers handled it when Eden Studios (who also developed 'Test Drive Unlimited 2') and EA Canada could've delivered a stellar job on the case as witnessed in the later three installments in the franchise.

      And of course, if I can add one more thing regarding the NFS tracks... Saki Kaskas' "Psychonaught" is bloody awesome, too!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Love Psychonaut. It was a shame to hear of Kaskas' passing; the guy was great.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Agreed. I gotta admit, I didn't know of his passing until recently when I was looking up at the current status of these composers. A crying shame.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    January 8
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Now in Xenia-O-Vision!
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      "Admiral Chuck Farrell, stiff-assed Canadian... literally"
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      ...and with a stiffy no less!
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      He knew there was no sense in going out half-cocked.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Looks like he got off before he got offed.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      He was a little restless, but he got off eventually.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Now, he has all the time in the world.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Maybe Admiral Farrel reunited with Xenia in the afterlife, forever to be crushed between her thighs.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Possible. She always did enjoy a good squeeze, after all.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      It's hilarious to see Xenia jumping backwards: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucFFRaKPCoE&t=1m05s
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Fifty Shades of Onatopp.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      https://memegenerator.net/img/instances/500x/74065238/has-sex-with-hot-chick-xenia-onatopp.jpg
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Dies. Lol!
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      a crushing defeat
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Had no chest for tights.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      In the end....he had a point.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Point taken.
    • Major_Boothroyd
      Major_Boothroyd
      Always the best profile pics @mattjoes
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Thank you, Major
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    January 8
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      ...but what a great way to go.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      He died doing what he loved.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      He enjoyed it while it lasted
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Well, once again, the pleasure was all yours.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      But he definitly had the wrong definition of safe sex
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Now you're on this, I hope we're going to have some gratuitous sex and violence.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      I certainly hope so too.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      I'd say the admiral most certainly had them.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Plenty... and he discovered Xenia had a crush on him.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      So, I take it brushing up on a little Georgian paid off?
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Well, it's all a matter of perspective
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      For her thighs only. Need to know... I'm sure you understand.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Her all time thigh scared the living daylights out of him.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      GoldenThighs.
  • So, fellow agents... one thousand posts. Some were smart, others were dumb, some were funny, others were dull, some were surprising, others were conventional, some inspired pride, others were regrettable. But clearly, most of them changed your lives in ways you can't possibly imagine.

    Okay, okay, I confess: most of them were silly jokes. Well, big deal. Everybody needs a laugh, so I was doing a public service here. Hell, I want you to pay me. Pay me my hard earned cash.

    What will my next one thousand posts have in store for us? I don't have a clue and don't really care, but if you want to know, stay tuned. I know I won't. Except when I log in.

    You know, to post. You gotta log in to post.
    January 4
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Buddy, I'm on 1.493 posts and have joined this place five years later than you ha ha....
      whatever nonsense or sense you may have posted in the past, your 1000th post about TWINE has made up for everything and I expect the same for GoldenEye, Tomorrow Never Dies and Die Another Day for your 2000th, 3000th, and 4000th post!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Ask and you shall receive, Mr. Ruegg.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      congrats my friend. I myself am damn close to that magic number.
    • Benny
      Benny
      Congrats on the first 1000 posts mattjoes.
      I'm sure there's a thread where you can post milestones.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      "Thank you, thank you"
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    January 2
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      New year. New rules.

      The Incredible Shining Brosnan will return.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      GoldenBond
      Tomorrow Never Arrives
      Four Films Are Not Enough
      Recast Another Day
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Mr. Stamper, I'm having fun with my headlines ;-)
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Mr. Ruegg, are we ready to release our new software?
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Yes, sir, As requested, it's full of bugs... which means people will be forced to upgrade for years.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Out-standing.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    December 2017
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    December 2017
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Merry Brosmas!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Santa Braus is coming!
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      H0
      H0
      7-'''
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      H0
      ...H0
      .......7-'''

      Now it worked. What happened to the delete button?
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      There was a delete button here? I thought whatever you wrote in another user's page stayed there forever.
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      There used to be a delete button. I had used it often before if I messed something up since there's no edit button.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      The delete button was... How do you say? 'Put away'.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      GoldenHoHoHo and Merry Dr. Christmas.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Smiert Deletum... death to delete, Minister.
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      Delete Another Day
      Licence to Delete Revoked
      To Delete Is Not Enough
  • I made this.

    November 2017
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    November 2017
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Brosmas is coming
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      Ho ho HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON!
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      I'm waiting for the day we get a James Bond Christmas special; Ho ho double-0.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Beards Brosnan returns in The December Man.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      The Santa Claus Affair
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Does he know any Christmas jokes?
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      Merry Christmas Jones everyone!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Dasher's Peak
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Beg your pardon. Forgot to shave.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    November 2017
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Back to our regularly scheduled programming.
  • mattjoes changed his profile picture.
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    October 2017
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Happy Hallotwine
    • Dragonpol
      Dragonpol
      Sheer brilliance!
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Thank you, sir!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      "Maybe you've been (upside) down here too long."
  • jake24
    That is one hell of an avatar!
    February 2017
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Buy me a pint!
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      I love the fact that Google image search thinks the name of the photo is "children's investment fund foundation." (At least most of the time that's the result I get)
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      That's what I get as well. Hilarious.

      The image is like a new flower species. "Goldeneyus Piercebrosnum."
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Isn t that a pierceuhh creation?
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      It's from The Incredible Suit blog.
    • Dragonpol
      Dragonpol
      I've seen you on CBn too.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      You know too much.
  • mattjoes joined.
    Welcome Aboard!
    January 2012