ClarkDevlin

About

Username
ClarkDevlin
Location
Prepare to lift off! 'Operation: Nightfire' has begun!
Joined
Visits
11,977
Last Active
Roles
Member
Posts
10,286
Favourite Fleming Novel
Dr No
Favourite Bond Film
For Your Eyes Only
Favourite Bond Actor
Roger Moore

Activity

  • PropertyOfALady
    How can I contact you?
    7:34am
  • cover-me-thank-almighty-he-didnt-say-fire-in-the-11343962.png
    December 7
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZJnjKz62D0
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Classic!!
    • barryt007
      barryt007
      Hahaha that would have brought tears to his eyes if he did say that !
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Volcano Eruption. Hahahaha!
  • Why am I becoming obsessed with Clouseau’s fly kick parody scenes? Haha!

    December 3
    • Andi1996Ruegg
      Andi1996Ruegg
      I get a kick out of watching those ha ha....
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      At least he didn't kick the bucket.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Haha, he's still alive and kicking!

      Sellers and Blake Edwards were a genius pair-up together.
  • QBranch
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      So, you found my foster brother.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      A brother from (die) another (day) (Yo) Mama!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      The author of all (Yo) Mama's pain!
  • giphy.gif
    November 25
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      "Beg your pardon, forgot to knock"
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Bruce Lee eat your heart out!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      "After you get your just desserts, I will clear the table."
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      For years I'd only seen this film dubbed into Latin American Spanish, and in the dub, not only they didn't (couldn't?) successfully recreate the cow-like slow motion scream, but crucially, they didn't recreate the sudden cut from the "Kung Fu" scream to the "somebody help me" scream, which is what makes the scene for me. So it was a revelation to finally hear the scene as originally intended.
    • Fire_and_Ice_Returns
      Fire_and_Ice_Returns
      Just a simple blemish in the kitchen
  • 10,000 posts - 24th of November 2017
    November 24
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Congrats! But how many of them are quality?
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      "You've had no quality! None!"
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      You had the ten thousand, but you just had to ruin everything by adding four more posts!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Five. Yes, considerably.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      10,007 is more of a milestone.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      That is undeniably true. I shall eat my words with ketchup.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      "Your file shows not enough posts. And it takes..."
      "Two more."
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      "Quite the post count you're stacking up. Trust me, I wish it wasn't the case."
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin - 10,007 status confirmed.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      "And how the hell could Devlin be so stupid? I give him triple-0 status, he celebrates by commenting on a DAD thread. Is the man deranged?
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      "Well, I understand that triple-0s with a DAD credit have a very short life expectancy... So, your mistake will be short-lived."
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      "And it doesn't bother you? writing all those posts?"
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      "I wouldn't be very good at my job if it did."
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      "You can stop pretending. You knew I wouldn't let this post count drop, didn't you?"
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      "Well, I knew you were Q."
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    November 21
  • tumblr_nmpkkpbAlz1rmy9cjo1_r1_250.gif
    October 29
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      That needs to be a gunbarrel. Haha.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Like this? Haha!

      https://youtu.be/fJRIeq1plPw
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      Yes! Haha.
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      Holy crap there's a whole Mr. Bean title sequence!
      [url]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgfiWJYF6U8[/url]
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Hahaha! Priceless! =))
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      https://m.popkey.co/50e818/JLo8Q.gif
    • BMW_with_missiles
      BMW_with_missiles
      He's infiltrating other franchises!
      https://i.pinimg.com/564x/1b/95/c9/1b95c997e86a84491b0f428893f2b9a1.jpg
    • jake24
      jake24
      I'm not sure how to dignify this with a response.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      When did Daniel Craig shoot that dancing footage?
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      He met Psy at a party and they decided to shoot a few videos for charity.

      "Ooppa! Gangnam Style!"
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Scooby Gangnam Style.
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      That's what I call putin on a show.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Ain't no disputin'.
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      JazzPutin
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Boot scootin' Putin.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      He's Putin quite an effort.
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Thanks for the inPut.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Achievement comes as a result of the work you putin.
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Next Russian president: Vlad Putout, how will the world put out with him?
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      He used to drop in occasionally. Putin and out.
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Vlad the inhaler.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Darth Vlader.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Emperor Palputin.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Mandy Putinkin: "My name is Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. You tried to kill my influence in Ukraine. Prepare to Crimea a river."
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Mrs Putinker Bell
  • Where did my Jack Lord gif go? Did somebody delete it?
    October 22
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      It is a mystery. One for Detective Steve McGarrett to solve.
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      Someone call Columbo.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Or maybe this is a case for Bruce you-know-who. ;)
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Bruce Wayne? or the man from the Murdock street? ;)
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      I'm on it. ;)
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      the lord works in mysterious ways
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Indeed! Praise the Lord!
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Black Jack Black Lord
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Black Jack on the red Lord, Miss...?
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Don't move, Mister Lord. *click*
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Outta ammo. Bang 'em, Danno!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Stick 'em up or I'll stick y'as down.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Stick 'em with the Jackknife.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Stick 'em and Stone 'em for Lord!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Sticks and stones are no match for Leave McGranite!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Well, if they can make cuffs and collars match on the sphere...
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      The Sphere Is Not A Cuff.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Huff, and Puff and Make it a Cuff!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Agent 'Strawberry puffs' Field's cuffs, Le Chiffre's bluffs and Beatles without muffs.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Field cuffs are Naughty-Nuff!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Bad luck Goldfinger, you're in the ruff.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Yeah, he had a Tuff luck coming to him.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Right! I am smoking on ze wrong end, because I have a very good reason.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      Damn, you already wrote that above. Anyway, do you have a rheum?
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Of coeurse ve have a rheum! I kneuw weut rheum means!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      CR Bond: Buff. SF Bond: Scruff.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      QoS Bond: Ruff. SP Bond: Scoff!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      AVTAK Russian: Klotkoff. GE Russian: clocked in the troff.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      OP meets DAD: SteVan Bierkoff
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Bond to DAD: "Forgive me father, for I have misplaced my Makaroff."
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      GF meets OP: Pussy Octogalore.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Spot the Die Another Day reference in Octopussy: MauDADams.
    • mattjoes
      mattjoes
      All your Lords are belong to us.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Lord Jack answers to no one but Jack Lord.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Lord ain't sayin' jack!
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Jacques Lorde
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    November 9
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    November 9
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    November 4
  • "McGarrett calling Five-O. McGarrett calling Five-O."

    giphy.gif

    In your face, hacker/eraser. ;)
    October 23
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Ya can't hack the Jack.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Jack back on track.
    • Thunderfinger
      Thunderfinger
      Little Jack Lord Fauntleroy
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Our Lord is a Jack of all trades
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Jackhammer and tongs.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Lords, Heights and five o' Jacks!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Highjacked in mid-heir.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      All Time Hair-High!
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      He had no head for heights.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Nope. Only hair for coma.
    • QBranch
      QBranch
      Danno, meet the Lord who shares my hairbrush. Jack Junior.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Junior by name. Senior by reputation.
  • Yes. I kneeeeuuuuuuw I’m smeuking ze wreoung end. Do you veunt to kneeeeuuuuuuw vy I’m smeuking ze wreoung end? I’m smeuking ze wreoung end beceeeuuuz I have a very geud reason!
    October 26
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    October 26
  • noSolaceleft
    Just a few pages, but they should give you an idea what to expect from me. Have fun. Also, whatever you find wrong with it don't hesitate to tell me.



    Book 1: A devil to embrace

    Prologue

    The old man snorted in disgust and turned away from the television, where once again a man with untamed beard implored the death of each and every unbeliever and – as a matter of course – the destruction of Israel. He felt tired and worn out. None of this was new. Not for his country and certainly not for his people, but never had the threat been greater.
    Never so close, never so powerful.
    His gaze went out of the window, over the hectic flickering Tel Aviv, whose noise penetrated loud and jumbled up to him. This, the most vital and intense of all modern cities in the Middle East, assuring itself of its vitality by relentlessly celebrating each and every night louder than the one before.
    And she would continue celebrating. Long after those, who so ardently wished for the destruction of this city and the country surrounding it, would be nothing but dust and ashes. So he had vowed, and so it would be. At least if God wanted and his plan was without blemish.
    He looked north, where the Satan he was about to embrace lived, luring to join him in a battle against something even worse.
    He had raised for himself every possible concern, had lived through each and every imaginable scenario time and time again, but still he had found nowhere else to turn to in this moment of highest desperation and so the decision was made.

    ***

    Day 1:
    The high speed train from Munich, where I was residing these days, delivered me with Teutonic precession right on schedule at Vienna's Western Train station.
    According to the old woman, with whom I had shared my train compartment, this was by no means always the case. She was – from the pound of jewelry slung around her wrinkled neck, right up to her condescending demeanor – the classic dyed in the wool high ranking civil servant widow copyright German Kaiserreich and on her way to bless her daughter, which was married to an Austrian, with her presence.
    Each and every single word she had fired at me for the last five hours had conveyed the pure conviction, that since the resignation of Bismarck things were steadily going downhill in Germany. Coincidentally, exactly since the time when they had neglected to hang the first Social Democrats at the highest gallows, along with a few suffragettes thrown in for good measure.
    How I had managed to stay below her anarchist radar and deemed worthy to be spoken to was a mystery to me, and, frankly, almost a little embarrassing. I just managed to say goodbye to her before she could begin to enlighten me on what was going wrong in Austria. Or worse, introduce me to her clan, which was supposedly awaiting her at the platform.
    She and a 1st class train ticket had been my best possible bulwark against border control, hence my enduring her presence. Since I had received my passport out of the hands of an employee of the German BND, which happens to be their intelligence service, there was really no reason to doubt it. Still, I generally prefer not to be noticed by law enforcement agencies at all whenever possible and those who had checked our train would have had to entertain an already very concrete suspicion, in order to fight their way through the disapproving gorgonian stare of the old frigate.
    Also, I didn't mind the, compared to air travel, three hours time loss. Traveling by train reminds me – accompanied by only very slight traces of melancholy – of a time when I had friends and not just acquaintances, when I was traveling for fun and considered the unknown exotic and not dangerous.
    Nobody out of the crowd of people, I allowed to drift me on the square in front of the station, made a move towards the taxis; thus preventing me from taking inconspicuously the second or third cab in the row. One, which for certain wasn't waiting for a specific passenger to take him for a ride to nowhere.
    I regularly flatter myself not to be overly paranoid for someone in my line of business so consequently I opened, with only barely perceptible hesitation, the car's trunk, threw in the little trolley case – which always makes me feel like a stewardess – and slid into the back, telling the driver my desired destination.
    I had the feeling that our way involved some quite unnecessary detours, but I didn't mind. I was in no hurry and it had been quite a while since I had been to Vienna.
    Not that anything had changed. The town was – as always – of fairytale-like magic at its more beautiful places and of pitiful primitiveness at its uglier ones. As so many times, when I had been here before, the thought crossed my mind how much both of these aspects had to do not only with the particular locations, but with the people crowding them.
    The taxi driver delivered me exactly to the street corner I had told him and took my money, but otherwise he had neither by facial expressions nor by words revealed that he had actually noticed me at all.
    I had him – maybe a little carelessly from a professional's point of view – depose me only two blocks away from my hotel, so just 10 minutes later I was filling in my registration card at the reception. I had no reservation, but this kind of to the bones optimized hotel had, especially in the off-season, always rooms available. From the outside, the building looked like an awe inspiring manifest to the long gone Austro-Hungarian period; back when the Habsburgers were calling the shots, including those that finally had led to World War One.
    Inside, the international hotel chain, which had bought it, had gutted it as thorough as the conscience of your average politician. What was left were suites that managed to squeeze in not quite 20 square meters a double bed with bedside tables left and right, a LCD-TV in front of it, and a small square table including a chair. All this plus a bathroom.
    I looked around me and realized once more how much modern interior decorators had learned from all those suicide research the Scandinavians had conducted for the last decades. Bright pastel colors combined with furniture completely devoid of any edges and daylight imitating creamy LED lighting did their best to stifle any possible approach of despondency.
    My luggage, which stows as quickly as it is repacked, didn't impede me appreciable. I glanced at my watch; it already had become half past four. Still one and a half hour until my rendezvous with my contact from the BND in the restaurant I had designated. The only reason why I had chosen it, was that - during my last stay in Vienna - it had distinguished itself by means of an outstanding Austro-Hungarian cuisine, which I happen to embrace very lovingly every time I get a chance. Mainly because here in Austria, just as about everywhere in the vicinity of the Balkans, they take regulations easy and food serious.
    Since nothing held me back here, I decided to hit the road again. The meeting point was pretty much on the other side of downtown, which meant I had a long walk ahead of me.
    I could live with that. Not that I needed something like an appetite stimulating effect, but there are few cities in the world where a walk resembles so much of a pleasant visit to the museum as in Vienna. I stepped outside and stared to the sky.
    Vaguely, like a premonition, fall had begun to come over the land, but the air was still mild while the night slowly began to dig its claws into the city. I took a deep breath of Viennese air and waltzed on.

    ***

    Vienna's St. Stephen's was, as probably pretty much every day of the year, full of people and only very few of them were here to worship. So it wasn't too difficult to identify Blendi's man.
    Just as we had agreed upon he knelt on the third front pew and muttered intensely into his folded hands.
    Blendi was Albanian and until the end of the Yugoslavian civil war had worked for the Serbian intelligence service. Actually, as he once had revealed to me in a quite drunken state, his name was Bledi, which in English would translate to something like Dumbi. Due to his intense business relations in the German-speaking countries he had decided to add the 'n', which was all for the better, both for him and his business partners.
    Albanians aren't of self-deprecating and cheerful nature anyway, let alone being particularly tolerant when someone suggests towards them - meant humorously or not - that their name implies they might not be very bright. On that tree-covered rock they call home, harmless jokes as that one regularly cause blood feuds, which usually last a century or two.
    Anyway. He created a fairly large portion of his income by supplying people, in my and similar lines of business, with things not available on every street corner. Such as guns, fake passports, and plastic explosives. You get the picture.
    I assumed strongly, that what I had ordered was in the small package on the kneeler next to the praying man. I sat next to him and identified myself with some short rhythmic fingernail scratching on the bench. He took some time to finish clearing his throat into his fists, unknotted his equally hairy and bony fingers, stood up, and went with the satisfactory feeling of having finished his job successfully. I just continued sitting there, allowing my gaze to reverently wander through the vast halls until I was relatively certain not to be in anyone's focus. Then I slowly grabbed the package, stowed it in the side pocket of my coat, and raised. Still in awe, of course.
    Outside, I went straight to the nearest fast food restaurant, whose washrooms I visited gratefully.
    In my small enclosed cabin I didn't let myself hinder too long by the wrapped around brown paper; meaning tearing it to shreds.
    I checked my order. A Hungarian Walam semi automatic handgun caliber 22, featuring a double-action trigger and aluminium frame. Strictly speaking, nothing more than a shameless rip off of the German Walther PP, albeit with lighter weight. Supplying something so small was actually well below Blendi’s threshold of expected profit margin, but I assumed he counted on me owing him a favor. Something guys like him always have use for.
    Many people tend to think, that with these little .22 bullets one can - at best - get a mouse pregnant, but those have rarely ever have fired a major caliber handgun in an enclosed space. Because no matter what movies and television may teach you, your basic action movie hero would be doomed to spend the rest of his career - plagued by deafness and tinnitus - at a desk after just about any average movie shootout.
    As for the low stopping power of small calibers, I generally try to compensate for it by combining straight shooting with as many holes as possible in places, where mother nature has not intended them to be. Strictly speaking for myself, I can report that this has worked out quite well so far.
    Also, I am always more than willing to rob my nearest victim from his whatever blaster to continue whatever bloodshed. I pressed one of three magazines in the frame and worked the slide slowly. No stuttering and scratching, no rough surfaces galling against each other, which might jam the gun.
    So far so good. At my present location I could hardly dwell any longer on testing its reliability, but back in my hotel room that would change decidedly.
    However, I somehow trusted Blendi on that one. He lived not too shabby by receiving very good money for supplying reasonably good commodities for mayhem and such, but also knew very well about how short life could be under certain circumstances. This is definitely the one industry in which dissatisfied customers do not just send a complaint. Unless it is charged with a pound of explosives that is, which generally has a very motivating effect on delivered services.
    He regularly boasted, that his armourers and gun tuners had previously worked for the Albanian secret service and the Albanian mafia. Probably the only time that one has heard the terms Albania and tuning in the same line, but still.
    I stuffed the Walam into the waistband just next to my appendix scar and continued - now ready for the rough world outside - my way

    ***
    October 16
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      That's my weekend reading sorted. Thanks, @noSolaceleft. :D

      I'll definitely let you know what I think of it as soon as possible.
  • October 11
  • PropertyOfALady
    Hey Leiter, where ya been?
    October 4
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    September 24
  • PropertyOfALady
    Could you talk to me on Facebook?
    September 14
  • 'Location' on personal profile pages should be changed to 'Personal/Self-Description'. Just saying.
    September 12
    • Murdock
      Murdock
      Agreed. Location is strictly paragraph 6, section 5. Need to know. I'm sure you'll understand. ;)
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Perfectly, Captain. Let's have 'em make it so. ;)
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    September 11
    • PrinceKamalKhan
      PrinceKamalKhan
      Book 'em, Danno!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Classic!
    • PrinceKamalKhan
      PrinceKamalKhan
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn06KJNbVEs
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      ...with Sammy Davis Jr singing to the Hawaii Five-O theme, it's an absolute amazement I can't even describe. Always loved that song!

      Just finished doing a marathon on the modern Five-0 and now, I'm watching the classics. Jack Lord is, without a shadow of doubt, the soul of the series. One of the coolest cops ever seen on small and silver screen.
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    September 11
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    August 31
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    August 25
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    August 23
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    August 21
  • The_Donald
    A Sherlock Holmes fan. Do you like the Jeremy Brett series?
    August 13
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Almost everything regarding the intellectual property. That includes the Russian series with Vasily Livanov, as well... if there are subtitles, of course.
  • ClarkDevlin changed his profile picture.
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    August 8
  • 00Agent
    Clark my friend, tell me, doesn't it seem awfully quiet around Dynamites Origin series or even a Black Box follow up, or am i just getting old and paranoid? :)
    August 1
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Hi there, my friend.

      I don't know, Dynamite is tight-lipped nowadays. However, I do believe they're in development and waiting to be announced soon with a greater and larger impact, seeing as it's James Bond Origins.

      I'm guessing they'll be around in November, later this year.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Thanks, thats what i needed to hear today! My guess was it will follow after Black Box, but apparently nothing does
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Immediately*
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      You're welcome, mate! :)

      Thing is, Benjamin Percy did mention he was onto a second story arc, and said something about Jason Masters returning. Or at least that's how I remember reading.

      I think Dynamite is investing a lot in Bond. Hopefully it won't end up being another pass of a wind like with the Dark Horse era.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      I hope not. Those comics have renewed my love for the character and they mean a lot to me.
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Mine, too!

      The Bond Comics are utmost definitely a requirement for the intellectual property. Bond deserves to have a comic book franchise.

      So far, 'Hammerhead' is my favourite, and I'm fairly certain 'Kill Chain' will be equally as great! :D
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      Kill Chain is the comic event of the year for me personally :) been looking forward to this from the day it was announced. And i am sooo excited for tomorrow
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Of course! The Black Box finale! :D

      And agreed, Diggle & Casalanguida (the latter especially) understand Bond perfectly! In looks, mannerism and style!
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      absolutely!
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      I wouldn't mind having them around for a third arc.
    • 00Agent
      00Agent
      They can stay as long as they want to
    • ClarkDevlin
      ClarkDevlin
      Precisely! :D