Explain a Bond Film Plot Badly

BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
in Trivia & Games Posts: 2,980
So you may have seen these "explain a film plot badly" things going around;
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I think it would be a good laugh if we had our own version of the game specific to Bond. I'll kick things off.

Goldeneye: A man gets revenge on a former coworker and then celebrates by getting a haircut.
(Full disclosure: I didn't think of that one myself. I read it somewhere and can't remember where.)
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Comments

  • PropertyOfALadyPropertyOfALady Colders Federation CEO
    Posts: 3,496
    Goldfinger: A man robs a bank with a man who loves his hat.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 2,980
    Tomorrow Never Dies: A wealthy businessman discovers that boating is not the right hobby for him.
  • Die Another Day a man masquerades as someone who conveniently looks like him, then a man turns into someone who looks nothing like him. The hero surfs a wave then an hour and a half later he surfs a tidal wave because the power of the sun is projected at him from a lazer beam from outer space. My bad that's the plot synopsis lol
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    edited October 2017 Posts: 2,980
    Spectre: Trials and tragedy reunite two long-lost step-brothers whose careers caused them to drift apart.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 2,980
    Casino Royale: A man wins a high-stakes poker tournament and celebrates with some ball slapping fun.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    edited October 2017 Posts: 16,159
    Dr No: a villain taunts a stupid policeman who kills him.
  • Goldfinger a bloke loses at cards then at golf, gets the hump and tries to nuke fort knox.
  • PropertyOfALadyPropertyOfALady Colders Federation CEO
    Posts: 3,496
    Skyfall: A mad crazy-haired cyberterrorist kills an old woman.
  • Spectre and Skyfall two brothers who are not brothers try to kill each other.
  • QBranchQBranch Always have an escape plan. Mine is watching James Bond films.
    Posts: 9,879
    DAF: Guy collects stones. Hilarity ensues.
  • PropertyOfALadyPropertyOfALady Colders Federation CEO
    Posts: 3,496
    Live and Let Die: A white dude fights some black guys.
  • MurdockMurdock Mr. 2000
    Posts: 16,027
    TMWTGG: A green wealthy assassin wishes to license out solar power.
  • edited October 2017 Posts: 12,636
    Moonraker a cucumber sandwich lover tries to obliterate all human life on earth.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 16,159
    LTK: A hothead for loyalty gets burned.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Will the real NTTD release date please stand up?
    Posts: 3,859
    YOLT: A bald man tries to start WW3 but gets a shuriken in the wrist.
  • MurdockMurdock Mr. 2000
    Posts: 16,027
    Thunderball. A grumpy cyclops holds Europe ransom while a Spy goes on vacation.
  • A View to a Kill Christopher Walken and Grace Jones are nuts.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Will the real NTTD release date please stand up?
    Posts: 3,859
    Skyfall: A computer geek learns to scan computers for viruses.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 16,159
    TMWTGG: Old west showdown in Phang Nga Bay, with a midget in tow.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 2,980
    Quantum of Solace: A film production company learns the importance of having actual writers.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Will the real NTTD release date please stand up?
    Posts: 3,859
    On Her Majesty's Secret Service: A man's marriage dissolves because he can't keep his work separate from his personal life.
  • Moonraker a woman does man stuff.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Will the real NTTD release date please stand up?
    Posts: 3,859
    Skyfall: A spy fails to retrieve top secret information, and then fails to save his boss' life.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Will the real NTTD release date please stand up?
    Posts: 3,859
    TMWTGG: A man kills another man, and then rides away on his junk.
  • BMW_with_missilesBMW_with_missiles All the usual refinements.
    Posts: 2,980
    FRWL: A man learns the hard way about proper pairing of wine with one's meals.

    DAF: An elephant struggles with his gambling addiction, while a mouse makes a new friend.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 16,159
    TND: Media mogul buys power and pays in pieces.
  • On Her Majesty's Secret Service a man falls in love, then sleeps with ten other woman then gets married.
  • MurdockMurdock Mr. 2000
    Posts: 16,027
    TWINE: Derranged Oil Tycoon pretends to be Ernst Stavro Blofeld while her invincible boyfriend just kinda does stuff.
  • mattjoesmattjoes Will the real NTTD release date please stand up?
    Posts: 3,859
    TMWTGG: A woman helps to stop the energy crisis with her ass.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 16,159
    DAD: A North Korean has a Father issue & Bond sets him free of it.
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