Life lessons taught by Bond

edited May 2013 in Bond Movies Posts: 2,782
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  • DragonpolDragonpol The Crazy World of David Dragonpol
    Posts: 13,862
    "4. Look Impeccable, Even in the Midst of Chaos"

    That could be the tag-line for the whole of the Roger Moore Era!
  • Posts: 2,782
    Dragonpol wrote:
    "4. Look Impeccable, Even in the Midst of Chaos"

    That could be the tag-line for the whole of the Roger Moore Era!

    Too right...old Rog's hair was impeccable.

  • DragonpolDragonpol The Crazy World of David Dragonpol
    Posts: 13,862
    Dragonpol wrote:
    "4. Look Impeccable, Even in the Midst of Chaos"

    That could be the tag-line for the whole of the Roger Moore Era!

    Too right...old Rog's hair was impeccable.

    An unflappable English gent...even when hanging onto the side of a train or a plane!
  • TheWizardOfIceTheWizardOfIce 'One of the Internet's more toxic individuals'
    Posts: 9,117
    Dragonpol wrote:
    Dragonpol wrote:
    "4. Look Impeccable, Even in the Midst of Chaos"

    That could be the tag-line for the whole of the Roger Moore Era!

    Too right...old Rog's hair was impeccable.

    An unflappable English gent...even when hanging onto the side of a train or a plane!

    I always have a little chuckle in the tuk-tuk fight when the action cuts to the market which is clearly on a set months later and Rog's hair suddenly goes three shades darker. They just mustn't have been able to get hold of a bottle of mahogany brown Just For Men at Iver Heath Boots and thought 'sod it. No one will notice'.
  • Posts: 11,175
    Dragonpol wrote:
    Dragonpol wrote:
    "4. Look Impeccable, Even in the Midst of Chaos"

    That could be the tag-line for the whole of the Roger Moore Era!

    Too right...old Rog's hair was impeccable.

    An unflappable English gent...even when hanging onto the side of a train or a plane!

    I always have a little chuckle in the tuk-tuk fight when the action cuts to the market which is clearly on a set months later and Rog's hair suddenly goes three shades darker. They just mustn't have been able to get hold of a bottle of mahogany brown Just For Men at Iver Heath Boots and thought 'sod it. No one will notice'.

    There's a similar one in TND when you see Broz climbing onto hotel the roof in TND after shooting Kaulfman. His hair is blowing in the wind. Seconds later he is walking down the stairs towards the underground car park and his hair is perfectly styled. There must be a deleted scene in which he stops in a toilet ;)
  • DragonpolDragonpol The Crazy World of David Dragonpol
    Posts: 13,862
    Dragonpol wrote:
    Dragonpol wrote:
    "4. Look Impeccable, Even in the Midst of Chaos"

    That could be the tag-line for the whole of the Roger Moore Era!

    Too right...old Rog's hair was impeccable.

    An unflappable English gent...even when hanging onto the side of a train or a plane!

    I always have a little chuckle in the tuk-tuk fight when the action cuts to the market which is clearly on a set months later and Rog's hair suddenly goes three shades darker. They just mustn't have been able to get hold of a bottle of mahogany brown Just For Men at Iver Heath Boots and thought 'sod it. No one will notice'.

    Can't say that I've ever noticed this, although I'll look out for it on my next viewing!
  • DarthDimiDarthDimi Behind you!Moderator
    Posts: 18,896
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.
  • DragonpolDragonpol The Crazy World of David Dragonpol
    Posts: 13,862
    DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    Political Correctness is dead, I'm glad to see!
  • DarthDimiDarthDimi Behind you!Moderator
    Posts: 18,896
    I don't believe in political correctness. I believe in Sean Connery's James Bond. ;-)

    3243300_700b.jpg
  • DragonpolDragonpol The Crazy World of David Dragonpol
    Posts: 13,862
    DarthDimi wrote:
    I don't believe in political correctness. I believe in Sean Connery's James Bond. ;-)

    3243300_700b.jpg


    Well, I'm glad to hear it. As John Gardner said, "Political Correctness makes us lose the ability to laugh at ourselves".

    This forum closes up a t 11.30 pm. It's political correctness gone mad! :)
  • Posts: 2,782
    DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    I still love that Saxby line...you could see it coming a mile away but Sean makes it genius.
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 33,904
    #4 is my favorite. Brosnan was a fan of that tie-adjusting in the midst of chaos, and look at Craig: just jumped into the back of a torn apart train as you chase an assassin? Uhh, yeah, why wouldn't you adjust your cufflinks?? I mean, common sense would dictate that.
  • DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    Or, "It's not sexual assault if you're Sean Connery".
  • 007InVT007InVT Classified
    Posts: 893
    DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    Fantastic!
  • 007InVT007InVT Classified
    Posts: 893
    For me the influences cover a range of Bondisms from the fashion, discerning taste in food and drink, traveling in style, attention to detail, reading, learnedness, fitness, etiquette, an appreciation for art through the books, cars and being a gentleman.
  • hullcityfanhullcityfan Banned
    Posts: 496
    DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    Love 4,5,6,7!
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded Dancing at midnight under the BeBop Moon
    Posts: 11,756
    DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi

    1) If a woman is uncooperative, smack her on the bottom and she'll yield.
    2) If a woman persists in being uncooperative, smack her in the face and she'll yield.
    3) If a woman has debts, she'll pay them. Tonight.
    4) If you see Burt Saxby, tell him he's fired!
    5) If you're in the passenger's seat and there's a red button somewhere, prepare to fly.
    6) Never try to hit the man with the steel jaws in the face, it hurts.
    7) Even if you hit the man with the steel jaws in the face a second time, it still hurts.
    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    These are hilarious, Dimi. Oh, you were serious? Really? ;)

    I also liked the article's #2 and #4 a lot: If you are handed lemons, use them as stepping stones, and Look impeccable in the midst of chaos (all the Bonds managed to do this, most noticeably Dan straightening his cuff links in Skyfall). I do love that.

    I will add my little bits here: What I have learned from Bond
    (For once, I am being rather straightforward and serious...)

    1) Never give up. No matter what. Even with great odds against you.
    2) Believe in yourself even if you don't believe in anyone else any more.
    3) Doing all you can, for the cause of what is good or right, matters.
    4) Go your own way, even against the system or orders, if you really need to in order to do what you believe is right.
    5) Friendship is a rare gem; cherish it
    6) Give your trust and loyalty carefully.
    7) Always have an escape plan.
    8) Be able to think on your feet and change all plans, including escape plans, in a heartbeat.
    9) Trust your instincts.
    10) Work at keeping your mind and instincts sharp, not just your body.
    11) Find a way to have peace with your past.
    12) Find meaning in your work, or change your work.
    13) Love is rare, precious, uncommon - but real.
    14) Keep your own sense of humor.
    15) Find things to enjoy in life, even small things.
    16) Gamble only when you need to.
    17) Take a risk when it is warranted; even big risks.
    18) Find solitude in being solitary.
    19) You can move on and change your life.
    20) Sometimes the old ways are the best ways.
    ;)

    and so on ...

    4EverBonded (my user name says it all)








  • hullcityfanhullcityfan Banned
    Posts: 496
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!
  • Creasy47Creasy47 In Cuba with Natalya.Moderator
    Posts: 33,904
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    This can't be serious...
  • MurdockMurdock Mr. 2000
    Posts: 16,035
    Creasy47 wrote:
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    This can't be serious...

    IFM.
  • DarthDimiDarthDimi Behind you!Moderator
    edited June 2013 Posts: 18,896
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    Obviously this is a made-up story. And even if it isn't, anyone mature enough would understand that we have a hard time believing it and wouldn't post it. Therefore, @hullcityfan, please spare us from this idiocy. You aren't helping your "street credit" here, in fact you're only reducing it.
  • Posts: 4,550
    DarthDimi wrote:
    Life lessons James Bond taught me
    By Darth Dimi


    8) Always be careful for the last hand. It's known to nearly kill someone.

    I'm pretty sure Wild Bill Hickok agrees with you.

  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 6,838
    DarthDimi wrote:
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    Obviously this is a made-up story. And even if it isn't, anyone mature enough would understand that we have a hard time believing it and wouldn't post it. Therefore, @hullcityfan, please spare us from this idiocy. You aren't helping your "street credit" here, in fact you're only reducing it.

    Indeed! pretending to learn from James Bond and then standing in a McDonalds? Seriously? James Bond in a McDonalds?

    a lesson I learned:

    It's better to know a little about women then about guns.

    If you are about to miss your plane, be sure to be spearfishing, you'll be allright and make some good money getting on board.

    If not spearfishing, be sure to steal a bike, you'll catch up when the plane goes over the edge of the cliff.

  • 007InVT007InVT Classified
    edited June 2013 Posts: 893
    @4EverBonded - good list. I particularly like 6, 10, 11, 12, 15, 16, 17, 18
  • pachazopachazo Make Your Choice
    Posts: 7,050

    Seriously? James Bond in a McDonalds?

    The sad thing is that if McDonalds threw enough money at Eon we'd probably be seeing Bond ordering a late night snack at the drive thru in the next film.
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded Dancing at midnight under the BeBop Moon
    edited June 2013 Posts: 11,756
    [/quote]
    Indeed! pretending to learn from James Bond and then standing in a McDonalds? Seriously? James Bond in a McDonalds?

    a lesson I learned:

    It's better to know a little about women then about guns.

    If you are about to miss your plane, be sure to be spearfishing, you'll be allright and make some good money getting on board.

    If not spearfishing, be sure to steal a bike, you'll catch up when the plane goes over the edge of the cliff.




    Ha! I love that one, @CommanderRoss. ;)
  • BennyBenny ...OctobennyModerator
    Posts: 11,213
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    So you poured a drink over some stranger, and they did nothing.
    Your pants must be ablaze!
    Come down to my local McDonalds on one of my brief visits, and you'll leave with more than your tails between your legs.
    Life lessons taught by Benny.

    If you're going to tell lies, at least make them believable.
  • chrisisallchrisisall Brosnan Defender Of The Realm
    Posts: 16,202
    Benny wrote:
    Come down to my local McDonalds on one of my brief visits, and you'll leave with more than your tails between your legs.

    :)) Great one, Benny!!
  • hullcityfanhullcityfan Banned
    Posts: 496
    Benny wrote:
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    So you poured a drink over some stranger, and they did nothing.
    Your pants must be ablaze!
    Come down to my local McDonalds on one of my brief visits, and you'll leave with more than your tails between your legs.
    Life lessons taught by Benny.

    If you're going to tell lies, at least make them believable.

    They did go mental anyway me and my mate wanted to go subway but my other mate said McDonalds.
  • CommanderRossCommanderRoss The bottom of a pitch lake in Eastern Trinidad, place called La Brea
    Posts: 6,838
    Benny wrote:
    He (Bond) taught me to fight and stuff like to be a little cheeky like Roger Moore I was with my mate in mcdonalds and my mate wanted me to get the food and two men behind me asked if all this was for me and I said no its for you threw the big mac into one and poured the drink over the other and he asked me who do I think I was and said Bond, James Bond I then got the food again. Also I got into a good fight and think of Bond VS Fisher!

    So you poured a drink over some stranger, and they did nothing.
    Your pants must be ablaze!
    Come down to my local McDonalds on one of my brief visits, and you'll leave with more than your tails between your legs.
    Life lessons taught by Benny.

    If you're going to tell lies, at least make them believable.

    They did go mental anyway me and my mate wanted to go subway but my other mate said McDonalds.

    So the greatest, most suave fictional spy in the world thaught you to go to either Subway or McDonalds or any other fastfood restaurant where they serve tasteless junk and randomly attack people. Wow. You most definately have seen a different Bond then I. Then you're telling us those people went 'mental' and you bravely ran away? Or did you actually pardon yourself and gave them money to buy new clothes?

    No, Bond wouldn't do that would he? Bond, as we all know, is a hooded, tattood over skinhead hooligan from a local footy club who can't tell his arse from his elbow, sits on the sofa all day drinking beer, receiving his benefits and steals anything he can't afford. We're proud of you son!
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