Continuation authors' top WTF? moments

edited October 2013 in Literary 007 Posts: 512
I've not read Boyd's new book, but I daresay there are a few in it. Without undue spoilers, what would you say are the moments where you think, this guy isn't even trying, that's nothing Fleming's Bond would ever do? I'll give Wood a free pass for Bond going into space, it was a book of the film, but otherwise...

I'll throw in one not very big example:

1) Carte Blanche. Bond gives help to a Middle Eastern mate to sort out some teenage hoodies who are bullying his kid at school, or some such thing, giving said hoodies a going over. Geez.... Of course, Bond later calls in the favour when on a mission.

Any others?
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Comments

  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    edited October 2013 Posts: 17,727
    I suppose John Gardner having James Bond visit Euro Disney and wax lyrical about Disneyland in Never Send Flowers (1993) was a WTF? moment for many people, though as you may or may not know, I hold a rather different view on that one, as I shall elaborate upon in my monograph on the 1993 Bond continuation novel. I think some people took this as being John Gardner's way of having a piss-take as he had authored several Boysie Oakes novels in a satirical vein years before.
  • MurdockMurdock The minus world
    Posts: 16,328
    Felix Leiter getting maimed by a shark a second time in the Novel version of Licence to Kill as it supposedly a sequel to Fleming's Bond? I dunno Just a big WTF.
  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    Posts: 17,727
    Murdock wrote:
    Felix Leiter getting maimed by a shark a second time in the Novel version of Licence to Kill as it supposedly a sequel to Fleming's Bond? I dunno Just a big WTF.

    I've always meant to write something on that, looking at Felix Leiter in the John Gardner era as I was asked to write about this for a website once but never got around to it, sadly. That is indeed a very good one, @Murdock.
  • When Gardner jumped the shark, you might say...
  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    edited August 2014 Posts: 17,727
    Using ice cream to drug military personnel - was that a WTF? moment for some in John Gardner's For Special Services (1982)? I know it was for some reviewers of the novel; in fact one reviewer even used that fact as part of the title for his review! ("Was the ice cream drugged or dopey?")
  • DiscoVolanteDiscoVolante Stockholm, Sweden
    Posts: 1,347
    News -> Literary 007
  • MrcogginsMrcoggins Following in the footsteps of Quentin Quigley.
    Posts: 3,144
    And as for Boyd and his peeping tom episode in Solo well WTF is that all about there is no need for it whatsoever .
  • Posts: 7,653
    Mrcoggins wrote:
    And as for Boyd and his peeping tom episode in Solo well WTF is that all about there is no need for it whatsoever .

    I second that, it did really make me uncomfortable and made the brilliant opening somewhat creepy. Never had that with any Bond novel before.

  • Posts: 5,772
    There's that whole "manual sex" scene in Benson's Never Dream of Dying.

    Marc Ange Draco's betrayal in Never Dream of Dying

    Oh, and the Jaguar in The Facts of Death and High Time to Kill. Overkill at its best (or is that worse ?) Not out of place in a movie, but in the books ? Not so much.
  • Posts: 66
    I too came here to post about the peeping tom bit in Solo. It is really off the wall. I have read all of Fleming's novels and felt this was out of character for Bond. Also the leaving of the glass with the note made it just that much creepier.
  • TheWizardOfIceTheWizardOfIce 'One of the Internet's more toxic individuals'
    Posts: 9,117
    The Ekranoplan in DMC.

    Hard to believe that this vehicle was actually real and not designed by Ken Adam so for it to finally appear in the Bond universe has me really excited.

    And then what? Bond doesn't even set foot in it and all the action featuring it takes place off screen. Superb Mr Faulkes, superb.
  • DB5DB5
    Posts: 408
    Felix Leiter charging the enemy in his wheelchair in "The Facts of Death."
  • Posts: 25
    I can think of a few:

    Gardner in FSS: Felix pimps out his daughter: "She's a hottie, isn't she James. Have at her!" Um, ick.

    Someone beat me to Benson's scene with Felix's wheelchair attack.

    CB: when Bond meets his love interest's grandmother. Yeah, that's the lady killing 007 we all know and love...uh, winning over the Bond-girl's elderly grandma.
  • I don't remember that in CB. Ah well...

    The 'revelation' about Poppy and her twin in Faulks' book one would hope Fleming would have avoided, it's so corny. Also Bond's chat about the Stones with May over the breakfast table, though to be fair Tommy Steele was namechecked as a cultural reference in Thunderball.

    And all that guff about Bond's parents in CB is straight out of Alex Ryder or Harry Potter.
  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    Posts: 17,727
    More than a few of the post-Fleming comic strip originals had Bond say unlikely things if I recall.
  • Posts: 25

    And all that guff about Bond's parents in CB is straight out of Alex Ryder or Harry Potter.

    Ugh. I forgot about that. "Hey, one of my parents was also a spy...and that has no bearing on anything. Thanks for reading!"
  • DB5DB5
    Posts: 408
    Bond killing a rat with his bare hands, then tearing the rat apart with his teeth to fashion a knife out of its backbone in "Never Dream of Dying."
  • MayDayDiVicenzoMayDayDiVicenzo Here and there
    Posts: 5,080
    DB5 wrote:
    Bond killing a rat with his bare hands, then tearing the rat apart with his teeth to fashion a knife out of its backbone in "Never Dream of Dying."

    I've not read NDOD, but that sounds a little much for a knife?
  • DB5DB5
    Posts: 408
    And that's not the worst part of NDOD. Rene Mathis is captured and has his eyes put out. He's permanently blinded, yet still is able to shoot one of the henchmen just as he's about to kill Bond.
  • edited January 2014 Posts: 1,856
    Higson: Bond's FIRST meeting with Elizabeth Windsor.
  • MayDayDiVicenzoMayDayDiVicenzo Here and there
    Posts: 5,080
    DB5 wrote:
    And that's not the worst part of NDOD. Rene Mathis is captured and has his eyes put out. He's permanently blinded, yet still is able to shoot one of the henchmen just as he's about to kill Bond.

    God, in the films, Mathis is underutilised, then some bloody continuation author goes and pulls his eyes out! Why can't he just be the guy from the Deuxieme Bureau?
  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    edited January 2019 Posts: 17,727
    DB5 wrote:
    And that's not the worst part of NDOD. Rene Mathis is captured and has his eyes put out. He's permanently blinded, yet still is able to shoot one of the henchmen just as he's about to kill Bond.

    God, in the films, Mathis is underutilised, then some bloody continuation author goes and pulls his eyes out! Why can't he just be the guy from the Deuxieme Bureau?

    That would be much too simple it would seem. The theme of the current Craig era (dare I say it) is kill everthing that moves and then ask questions (much later), if at all.
  • MayDayDiVicenzoMayDayDiVicenzo Here and there
    Posts: 5,080
    Dragonpol wrote:
    DB5 wrote:
    And that's not the worst part of NDOD. Rene Mathis is captured and has his eyes put out. He's permanently blinded, yet still is able to shoot one of the henchmen just as he's about to kill Bond.

    God, in the films, Mathis is underutilised, then some bloody continuation author goes and pulls his eyes out! Why can't he just be the guy from the Deuxieme Bureau?

    That would be much too simple it would seem. the theme of the current Craig era (dare I say it) is kill everthing that moves and then ask questions (much later), if at all.

    It frustrates me because Mathis is a great character. Giancarlo Giannini is a great Mathis and he should have appeared in future installments. However, this has gone off topic.
  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    Posts: 17,727
    Dragonpol wrote:
    DB5 wrote:
    And that's not the worst part of NDOD. Rene Mathis is captured and has his eyes put out. He's permanently blinded, yet still is able to shoot one of the henchmen just as he's about to kill Bond.

    God, in the films, Mathis is underutilised, then some bloody continuation author goes and pulls his eyes out! Why can't he just be the guy from the Deuxieme Bureau?

    That would be much too simple it would seem. the theme of the current Craig era (dare I say it) is kill everthing that moves and then ask questions (much later), if at all.

    It frustrates me because Mathis is a great character. Giancarlo Giannini is a great Mathis and he should have appeared in future installments. However, this has gone off topic.

    I agree. A real pity that they killed him off as he was a great character for the Craig era reminiscent of those found in the older James Bond films.
  • True, though I could never really hear clearly anything the actor said.
  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    Most of Devil May Care.
  • 4EverBonded4EverBonded the Ballrooms of Mars
    Posts: 12,459
    Most of Carte Blanche (which I liked even less than DMC).
  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    Oh, yeah, whichever Gardner book has Blofeld's daughter. She's a WTF character, only having one breast and all.
  • DragonpolDragonpol https://thebondologistblog.blogspot.com
    Posts: 17,727
    Oh, yeah, whichever Gardner book has Blofeld's daughter. She's a WTF character, only having one breast and all.

    For Special Services (1982) - I call it the James Bond Junior approach to Bond as much as I like it - Blofeld's daughter and Felix Leiter's daughter feature and so too should James Bond's nephew probably. That's my critical line on the novel anyway... ;)
  • Agent007391Agent007391 Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start
    Posts: 7,854
    Felix's daughter wasn't much of a problem (I say much), it was mostly just Blofeld's daughter that I had a problem with.
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