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Strawberry awards for Bond's "Hall of Shame"
Have we touched on this before? If so, then I stand corrected. If not, then let it rip.
My nominations:
Worst film MR
Worst villian Drax
Worst song DAD by Madonna
Worst gadget Invisible Aston Martin from DAD
Worst girl Holly Goodhead from MR
Worst FX DAF
Worst scheme DAF ( It is never clear just what Blofeld wants to accomplish here. Is it money? Makes me wonder, how much money would satisfy a guy who owns a diamond encrusted satellite)
Worst PTS TMWTGG
Worst Screenplay TMWTGG
Worst Bond Pierce Brosnan
Be interested in hearing comments or your nominations...
My nominations:
Worst film MR
Worst villian Drax
Worst song DAD by Madonna
Worst gadget Invisible Aston Martin from DAD
Worst girl Holly Goodhead from MR
Worst FX DAF
Worst scheme DAF ( It is never clear just what Blofeld wants to accomplish here. Is it money? Makes me wonder, how much money would satisfy a guy who owns a diamond encrusted satellite)
Worst PTS TMWTGG
Worst Screenplay TMWTGG
Worst Bond Pierce Brosnan
Be interested in hearing comments or your nominations...
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Comments
Worst villian Dominice Green
Worst song QoS
Worst gadget There's no such a thing as a worst gadget
Worst girl Holly Goodhead
Worst FX DAF
Worst scheme MR
Worst Screenplay TMWTGG
Worst Villain: Gustav Graves
Worst Song: Die Another Day
Worst Gadget: If it counts, then the Invisible Aston Martin
Worst Girl: Stacey Sutton
Worst FX: Die Another Day
Worst Scheme: Moonraker
Worst Screenplay: Die Another Day
Villian: Graves
Song: DAD
Gadget: Invisible Aston Martin
Girl: Jinx
Effects: Iceberg Parasailing
Scheme: Genetic alteration in order to split up Korea via space.
Screenplay: DAD
Non-DAD Nominations:
Film: MR
Villian: DAF Blofeld
Song: Another Way To Die
Gadget: Radioactive lint
Girl: Anya
Effects: QOS
Scheme: Destroy Earth from Space and repopulate with "perfect specimens"
Screenplay: DAF
Worst villian Koskov
Worst song Only Myself to Blame.
Worst gadget Scaramanga's Flying Car.
Worst girl Mary Goodnight.
Worst FX YOLT
Worst scheme FRWL (Controversal I know, but the villain's plan was to steal a Decoding machine, not very grand.)
Worst Screenplay Die Another Day.
Well, it was a realistic scheme, but I don't know if that necessarily makes it bad. At that time especially code-breakers or machines that could replace the human labor of code-breaking were very valued as I'm sure you know, so it's actually quite an important/invaluable object in the Cold War thriller that is FRWL. I agree that it isn't as flashy or ambitious as say, hitching a rocket up to space to restart the human race with superior specimens as the earth's population is wiped out, but I love it for its faithfulness to real world spycraft. It's one of those elements (or objects) I could see a Hitchcock spy film being centered around as well. I've never been a fan of the more sci-fi flavored schemes in the Bond series anyway; I'm much more suited to realism or the believably fantastical.
Worst villian - OHMSS's Blofeld
Worst song - QOS
Worst gadget - There's no such a thing as a worst gadget
Worst girl - May Day or Tiffany Case
Worst FX - Dr No
Worst scheme - FYEO
Worst Screenplay - OHMSS
Worst villian - Gustav Graves
Worst song - For Your Eyes Only (Apologies to Sheena Easton, but if I had to pick a worst)
Worst gadget - Moonraker's amphibian gondola
Worst girl - Natalya
Worst FX - Die Another Day
Worst scheme - Skyfall (Loved the movie, but Silva's "plan years in the making" had some pretty big errors in judgment)
Worst Screenplay - Moonraker
Worst villain - Gray's Blofeld
Worst song - The Man With The Golden Gun
Worst gadget - Vanish
Worst girl - Mary Goodnight
Worst FX - Die Another Day
Worst scheme - Moonraker - utterly preposterous
Worst Screenplay - Diamonds Are Forever
Worst villian- Gustav Graces
Worst song- Another Way to Die
Worst gadget- DAD Invisible car
Worst girl- Jinx
Worst FX- Die Another Day. DAF had better FX, and that was in '71
Worst scheme- The Man With the Golden Gun AND Die Another Day
Worst Screenplay- Die Another Day
Worst film: TMWTGG (at least DAD is really good for the first 60 minutes)
Worst villian: Karl Stromberg
Worst song: Another Way to Die, From Russia with Love and Thunderball close runner-ups
Worst gadget: Invisible Aston Martin from DAD
Worst girl: Lisl von schlaf, I find her particularly repulsive
Worst FX: You only live twice
Worst scheme: The Spy who Loved Me, which is really an underwater You Only Live Twice.
Worst Screenplay TMWTGG
Worst film: DAD-worse than CR67
Worst villian: Graves
Worst song: The Experience of Love
Worst gadget: Bondola
Worst girl: May Day
Worst FX: DAD (surfing scene)
Worst scheme: DAD
Worst Screenplay:DAD
Worst Bond: Pierce Brosnan
Worst Villain - Karl Stromberg
Worst Song - Keys and White / Another way to die
Worst Gadget - Explosive alarm clock (wasn't even utilized)
Worst Girl - Halle Berry / Giacinta Johnson
Worst F/X - wave surf / Die Another Day
Worst Scheme - Dominic Greene / Bolivian water supply / Quantum of Solace
Worst Screenplay - Diamonds are Forever
Worst Bond - Pierce Brosnan
Worst villian - Koskov (should have gone with fellow dutchie Hauer)
Worst song by Keys and White / Another way to die
Worst gadget - the sony advertisements with material in CR was quite annoying
Worst girl -Vesper Lynd, blame the scriptwriters for her bland performance
Worst FX - DAD, the famously poor sfx surfing scene in Iceland
Worst scheme - Silvas scheme especially the response from MI6 that allowed a lunatic run free including military helicopters being employed and no SAS around anywhere.
Worst Screenplay -SF, plothole upon plothole it was more about being cool than logical.
Worst Bond - Timothy Dalton
Worst villian Zorin
Worst song AWTD
Worst gadget the pen-for-poisoned-pen-letters (look, if CR67 does it first, you know you can't do it again)
Worst girl Fields (so much potential, so little accomplished)
Worst FX DAD (handsdown THE worst)
Worst scheme DAF (I mean: what's the point?)
Worst Screenplay TMWTGG
Worst villain Blofeld (DAF)
Worst song AWTD (QOS)
Worst gadget The Bondola (MR)
Worst girl Tilly Masterton (GF - couldnt act for toffee)
Worst FX DAD
Worst scheme MR
Worst Screenplay DAF
Worst Bond George Lazenby
Worst Villain - Gray's Blofeld (If he wasn't supposed to be Blofeld I could tolerate him.)
Worst Song - The Man With The Golden Gun
Worst Gadget - The Vanquish
Worst Girl - Jinx
Worst FX - Diamonds Are Forever
Worst Scheme - Die Another Day
Worst Screenplay - Die Another Day
Worst villains : Dominic Greene and Gustav Graves
Worst songs : AWTD and DAD
Worst Gadget : Scaramanga's flying car
Worst Girl : Jinx
Worst FX : DAD
Worst schemes : DAF and QOS
Worst screenplay : DAD
Worst Bond : George Lazenby
@Mirandafrost at the risk of getting flamed, OHMSS the worst screenplay? Dick Maibaum has always said that it was his BEST Bond script. I cannot agree with what you say here but I will defend to the death your right to say it.
:)
Worst Villain: Aries Kristatos
Worst Song: Die Another Day
Worst Gadget: Bondola
Worst Girl: Jinx Johnson
Worst SFX: Die Another Day
Worst Scheme: Skyfall
Worst Screenplay: Die Another Day
Worst 007: George Lazenby
That pretty much sums it up for me.
Worst Villian :: Dominic Greene
Worst Song :: Alicia Keys and Jack White - Another Way To Die
Worst Gadget :: The Bondola (Moonraker)
Worst Girl :: Stacy Sutton
Worst FX :: Quantum Of Solace - The Freefall
Worst Scheme :: Quantum Of Solace
Worst Screenplay :: Casino Royale (it's chock full of the series most vomit inducing dialogue)
Worst Bond :: Daniel Craig
Sorry but however you cut it, the scheme in FRWL is the most intelligent and realistic of the series and one of the best, if not the best. The death of all life on earth, if it is achieved through implausible means, is not very good. The humiliation of MI6 through a plan both ruthless and manipulative, however, is brilliant. FRWL has many qualities, its scheme is one of its strongest points.
Agree 100% with this.
Worst Villian :: Gustav Graves and Elliott Carver
Worst Song :: Sheryl Crow + Madonna
Worst Gadget : an Aston Martin goes invisible
Worst Girl :: Jinx Johnson + Christmas Jones
Worst FX :: anything involving tidal waves and SFX in Die another Day
Worst Scheme :: TWINE, Bond unravels a scheme to increase petroleum prices by triggering a nuclear meltdown in the waters of Istanbul. Yeah right.
Worst Screenplay :: Nothing but nothing beats the schlop served as DADs script
Worst Bond :: Pierce Brosnan
Worst Movie : Diamonds are Forever
Worst Villain : Blofeld in DAF
Worst Song : Another way to Die (runner-ups : TMWTGG and DAD)
Worst Gadget : the Bondola
Worst girl : Mary Goodnight (sorry, I like my Bond Girls with at least a modicum of brain between the ears)
Worst FX : Yes, the surf scene in DAD, although honorary mention go to the space scenes in YOLT)
Worst Scheme : tie between YOLT and TSWLM (what made they think they would survive a nuclear war ?)
Worst Screenplay : the Hamilton/Moore trilogy.
Worst Bond : Well, none, really. I like each of them.
Villain- Blofeld (DAF) Remember the massive, intimidating master criminal or the samurai loving psychopath of the novels? Yeah, apparently the screenwriters and Guy Hamilton didn't either so here's Charles Gray in drag! I'm fine with the films doing their own thing and being different from the books (I love TSWLM for example) but turning Blofeld, Bond's arch nemesis, into a camp old drag queen was too far.
Song- Another Way To Die I think it's so awful that it barely even qualifies as music. Shame because I do like Jack White.
Gadget- The Bondola At least the vanquish, while silly and OTT, would be useful for a spy. The Bondola is not only OTT, it's also useless. When is Bond ever going to need a gondola hovercraft again? Why the hell would he need it in the first place? I have a theory: the henchmen that attacked him weren't Drax's men. They were hired by Q just so MI6 didn't think the Bondola was a massive waste of time and money.
Girl- Jinx I think Halle Berry is a good actress but she's shit in DAD. Her performance, plus the awful lines Jinx got, make the worst Bond girl. She's fit though.
FX- Die Another Day Again, I don't think I need to explain why.
Scheme- YOLT because Blofeld wouldn't even break even. His plan will net him a hundred million dollars. Would that cover the cost of his spaceship, private army and ridiculously flashy volcano lair? His plan in DAF was pretty stupid too but he's been forced to downsize to an oil rig and he's probably gone a bit mental because of Bond defeating him on a regular basis, SPECTRE falling apart and Irma dumping him, so I'll cut him some slack there.
Screenplay- Die Another Day There are one or two good lines (my favourite is "plenty of ice, if you can spare it"), and it's very fast paced but it's full of cringe worthy dialoge and the plot is crap.
Bond- George Lazenby. It's not that he did a bad job mind, I don't think any of the actors were bad. I think he's probably the closest we've ever gotten to Fleming's character but I also think that he's not the best actor and that he was helped massively by the film around him. I do like him though and I feel bad placing him last, he seems like a laugh in real life too. I like him, I just like the others more.
Worst Villain : Koskov and Whitaker
Worst Song : Madonna Die Another Day
Worst Gadget : Craig's blue snuggers
Worst girl : Eva Green as Vesper, way too crabby
Worst FX : Slam sunk. Ice berg surfing in DAD
Worst Scheme : controlling Bolivia's water supply. Yawn.
Worst Screenplay : Haggis QoS. Death by dialogue and boring story to boot.
Worst Bond : Craig. Too much melodrama.
That is all.